Separation between mother and newborn: how to handle the first day at daycare

The first separation between mother and newborn is one of the most delicate and complex moments for any parent. Starting nursery marks a fundamental stage in the child's growth and represents an important emotional change for the mother.

First of all, it is important to remember that separation is an essential step for the child's development; the nursery, in fact, offers the little one the opportunity to socialize with other children, learn to relate, and develop their cognitive and motor skills in a safe and stimulating environment. 

Facing separation does not mean breaking the bond, but transforming it. Adequate preparation can help both mother and newborn to experience this with less stress. Here are some useful tips to make this transition more peaceful:

• start gradually: if possible, it is useful to start leaving the child at the nursery for a few hours a day, gradually increasing the length of stay. This helps the newborn to familiarize themselves with the environment and with the new reference figures.
• create a reassuring routine: children benefit from routine. Establishing daily habits that include nursery can reassure the little one, making them feel safe and protected. For example, a kiss before going to the nursery or a comfort object to take with them can make a difference.
• stay calm: newborns perceive the mother's emotional state. If the mother is calm and serene, the child will feel more secure. Before separation, it's good to take a few minutes to relax and face the moment positively.

Not only does the child have to adapt to the change, but also the mother. Separation can generate feelings of guilt, anxiety, and sadness. It is essential to recognize and accept these emotions without judging oneself. The fact that the child goes to nursery does not mean that the bond weakens; on the contrary, often, the moments spent together outside the nursery become more intense and appreciated.

Comparing experiences with other mothers going through the same journey can help you feel less alone and discover that certain emotions are completely normal.

The advice is to use this time, while the child is at nursery, to dedicate yourself to yourself, whether for work, hobbies, or simply to relax. This will allow you to recharge your energy and face daily life with more serenity.

This phase is an opportunity for both to grow: the child will discover new realities and develop their autonomy, while the mother will have the opportunity to rediscover herself and strengthen the bond with the little one.